BAD TABLE MANNERS!!!

Went to brunch at a great spot, and my enjoyment was cut short when i see RAGGEDY ANN over here SLOUCHING IN A CHAIR...AND IN HORRIBLE CLOTHES!
This place is upscale nice, with a casual outdoor area. Lets start with the MANNERS b4 the outfit. DONT PUT UR F******* LEGS UP AT A RESTAURANT!!! WHO DOES THAT?! NO CLASS!!! THIS ISNT A PICNIC, THIS IS A NICE ESTABLISHMENT!! I DONT WANT TO SEE THE DIRTY BOTTOMS OF UR SHOES WHILE I'M EATING! GROSS! SIT UP STRAIGHT, GET UR ELBOWS OFF THE TABLE, PUT UR FEET DOWN, AND STOP DRAPING URSELF OVER A CHAIR, YOU SLOTH!
and before you come to the next restaurant: DRESS IN SOMETHING OTHER THAN A CROTCHET BIB (well maybe she needs it-slob)... and little girls skirt, and little flats... SHE WAS DRESSED LIKE A 5 YEAR OLD. GROW UP AND PRESENT URSELF TO THE WORLD IN AN APPROPRIATE MANNER!

IS THIS YOUR FATHER? OR GRANDFATHER?? SLOB!!!!!

So it seems that STARBUCKS is the place to go if ur a SLOB, a horrible dresser, have NO CLASS, and just plain DISGUST ME. It's not Starbucks fault, it's just that they're so mainstream and affordable and on EVERY CORNER so that ANYONE can go. I prefer little neighborhood bakery/coffeehouse businesses: small, quaint, friendly; and it supports our community.

WHEN I GO INTO A COFFEE ESTABLISHMENT, AND I SEE GRANDPA LOUNGING LIKE A F******** SLOB ON THE CHAIR FIRST THING IN THE MORNING, it DISGUSTS ME. WTF is wrong with you?? WHERE R UR MANNERS??? (And think about any offspring this man has!! What do you think they behave like; or if they have manners and proper etiquette? Probably not, and if they exist, should be living in a ZOO!!) WHO LIED TO YOU MR, and told you it was ok to represent yourself like this??????? I would be embarrassed as all hell if this was my father or grandfather; newspapers on the floor, under the chair, one leg up, CROTCH SPREAD WIDE OPEN???? SICKENS ME.... CLOSE YOUR F******* LEGS and SIT UP OLD MAN! (and he was probably in 50's). My dad is pushing 70, and he's not sitting like an AMOEBA somewhere!!!!!

It took every sleepy fiber in my body to resist going over to him, and telling him what i just shared with you!! Thank GOD i don't work there, i would have kicked his ass out: NO SLOBS!!

OSCAR FASHIONS!!! HITS AND MISSES!!! Part 2

Here is the second half of the Women's Oscars dresses.... the bold, the beautiful, the ugly(ish). On a side note, did anyone else notice the hair? Apparently not the hair stylists, since they all looked like they had never seen a comb, brush, or pair of scissors. Take a deep breath, and get ready for the second batch!

Merryl Streep

White dress by Chris March (from Project Runway!!!) Not my favorite, it's a little Matronly, but age appropriate. Her SKIN, HAIR, MAKEUP and JEWELRY (Fred Leighton Art Deco bracelets) make up for it. Plus, she's wearing Jimmy Choos! Good Girl!!

Victoria Beckham

PERFECTION. She is A STICK, and weighs 2lbs.... yet she looks like A BEAUTIFUL STATUE OF A WOMAN. POSTURE, CONFIDENCE (look at the HEEL!!) PERFECTION.

Katherine Bigelow

The Oscar winner of the night... so congrats first. Now for her "look". This dress was SOOOO tight, she could BARELY BREATH. She was up for EVERY OSCAR category, she sat IN FRONT OF HER EX James Cameron, GET ONE SIZE UP!!!!! She looks like she could be Elizabeth Hurley, and she looks SOOO SCARED... No wonder her hair was left in front of her face like a MOP. A Half updo would be my suggestion. (AND NO RED BAND for whatever you're supporting...FOR ONE NIGHT PLEASE.)

Nicole Richie

This girl is TINY. She is HILARIOUS. Her dress is DROWNING HER. I like it: FOR A DISCO PARTY @ STUDIO 54 IN THE 70's!!! The matching eye makeup, really? She is late 20's and dressing for a Disco Reunion someone from that era would be wearing! She may be a mom, but DAMN, she is dressing like a GRANDMA! Show ur figure now while u can, and save that dress for Oscars 2050.

Paula Patton

One of the most Beautiful women in Hollywood. She is like Halle Berry; she can leave the house with no makeup and she is stil so sexy. (I have worked with her before, and let me tell u... STUNNING). However, her stylist should be strangled. I like orange, its unusal, it attracts attention, (u don't have to worry about ANYONE ELSE WEARING THAT COLOR)... but just because she's pregnant, doesn't mean she needs to be WEARING THE BIB ON HER DRESS! I mean, what the hell is that ruffle???? If you live in LA, or have been to El Coyote Mexican restaurant, the dress looks like it should be on their servers (a Folkorico dancer). The matching clutch is too matchy matchy.... and BECAUSE she is pregnant, her body IS bigger, she looks like America Ferrera in this (UGLY BETTY: meaning Big and FRUMPY).... BLACK or NAVY NEXT TIME!! :)

Sigourney Weaver

Great actress, reminds me of my mom. Classy, but can kick ass. This is age appropriate, her figure is great, length, color, hair, jewelry,....everything is working for her....ONLY BECAUSE I'M NEUROTIC, ( read: A PERFECTIONIST) I would change ONLY 1 thing: The shoulder strap. It makes the top half of the dress too heavy. All the dress needed was the brooch to cinch the shoulder area just a bit more, and it would make the dress a bit more delicate. Other than that: she gets an A.

Mariah Carey

So, this is my favorite person EVER. She looks great, healthy, and happy. Her wight looks great too. Her hair is done, minimal makeup, great jewelry.....and now, I have to critique :( She is at the Oscars for "Precious", and HER STYLIST needs to know the difference between ACADEMY AWARDS and regular day wear. This is what she looks like anywhere: a concert, a talk show, a birthday bash, grocery shopping if she ever did)....WEAR A GOWN! AND THE SHOES ARE SO WRONG!!! Christian Loboutin, I'm all about! slits "up to there?" and "showing the boobs?"HELL YEAH...but i want to see her do something different, REGAL! Hair up, strapless flowing gown... THAT, I would have been "Loving ya long time!"

Tina Fey

Well well... Michael Kors may not be the FASHION KNOW IT ALL AFTER THIS!! He is Americana Sportswear, NOT COUTURE CREATOR. She looks uncomfortable and awkward,..a deer in the headlights!!! So what's with the weird angle of the strap and other side? its like its supposed to be soft and feminine, then he OD'd on Heavy Metal drugs! Is this BLACK LEOPARD PRINT? IS IT SEE-THRU? and her hair is like misguided prom... it just looks poorly put together...Tina is a funny woman, but im not laughing with her on this. Sadly, I'm laughing at her... :(

Penelope Cruz

Wrapping paper, frizzy hair..thats what i see. BORING. No shape. its like she was wrapped around and around by a Donna Karen with a huge roll of fabric, and the rest was left hanging. blah... HOWEVER!!! LOOK AT THE GEM BEHIND HER ON THE RIGHT!!!! SOME HORRIFYING OUTFIT!!!!!!!! HORRIBLE LENGTH DRESS, (gives stubby leg look), and WTF WLTY with those HOT PINK GLOVES??? shoes are horrendous too.... that lady needs to be arrested/shot/put away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Julianne Moore

She was in A SINGLE MAN, a film by TOM FORD (WHO IS GOD when it comes to fashion). So why did she leave the house looking like this??? Did she also get the memo to be alabaster white, the same as her dress??? and THE HAIR-WHERE THE HELL IS THE BRUSH!!!!!?????